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Too often, many of us prioritize everyone and everything and we forget to prioritize ourselves.  We put our children, our mate, our jobs, our friends, and our family’s needs before our own needs.  We forget about what is important to us, when we are so focused on what is important to everyone else.  You have to remind yourself that YOU matter too.  I’m not saying forsake the needs of other people.  What I am saying is do not overlook your needs, while being so busy trying to meet someone else’s needs  If you do not take good care of your needs first, you will not have enough resources to help take good care of anyone else.  When you are on an airplane, you are instructed to first put on your oxygen mask, before you help someone else put on their oxygen mask.  Because, if you do not put on your oxygen mask first, if you lose too much oxygen, you will not be alive to help anyone else.

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You should be a priority, especially to yourself.  Your needs are just as important as anyone else’s needs.  I am not saying, make yourself a priority, in a selfish way.  I am saying, prioritize yourself in a self-caring, self-preservation, and self-loving way.  Invest in you, before you give someone else all of your resources.  Equip yourself with the tools you need to succeed in life, so that you can show someone else the way to achieve success as well.  Don’t neglect your needs.  If you do not care enough about you and make yourself a priority, no one else will.  It is okay to say no, when you cannot do something for someone else.  It is okay to say, I don’t have the time, energy, or resources, when someone asks you to do something that you don’t have the time, energy or resources to do.  When saying no, take that guilt that you place on yourself off of you, by learning how to make yourself a priority.  If no one else around you has a problem with making themselves a priority, then you should not have a problem with making yourself a priority as well.

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Pleasing everyone is an unattainable goal, so do not try to be a people pleaser.  Trying to please everyone is a set-up for failure.  Instead of trying to please everyone, focus on what makes you happy by prioritizing your needs.  Of course, there will be people who do not like that you make yourself and your needs a priority, but that is not your concern.  Most people will not like it, because this means that they are not a top priority in your life and they are focusing on their needs, despite the fact that you would be neglecting your own needs to help them meet theirs.

 

Make yourself a priority.  You are important.  What you want for your life does matter.  Whatever or whomever you have to rearrange on your list of priorities, do it.  What’s a priority to you, is not always a priority for someone else.  Your needs are specific to you.  Their needs are specific to them.  Most people prioritize their needs, so why can’t you prioritize your needs? You’ve spent so much of your time investing in everyone else personally and professionally.  Now, is the time to invest in YOU.  Make yourself and your needs a priority! 

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By Lynnette Clement