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GOOD HEALTH & WELLNESS
POST TRAUMATIC STRESS

Post Traumatic Stress (P.T.S.D.) is a mental health condition that is triggered by a tragic event.  It effects people in different ways.  There are different life experiences that can trigger a stress response and some are: emotional, mental, sexual or physical abuse, death, divorce, witnessing a horrific crime, rape, or other incidents.  How we cope/deal with it will determine how we live our lives or merely exist.  If you or someone you know is dealing with Post Traumatic Stress, do not judge them or yourself for the way in which he/she thinks or behaves, instead, support him/her by guiding them to seek professional counseling services.  Try not to give up too much of yourself, in trying to help someone with P.T.S.D., if you are not a professional who can help him/her make the necessary life adjustments that they need to make in effort to get to their other side of through.  It is perfectly okay to seek help from a professional counselor, it doesn't mean that you are crazy, weak or that something is wrong with you, as some stigma might suggest.  Seeking help, just means that you are wise enough to identify when you are having a difficult time getting through the life experiences on your own and you want to take control of your thoughts, behavior and life again in a more positive way.  

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When people experience P.T.S.D., they can experience negative thoughts, and mood swings.  The mind, body, and soul goes through different emotions that can cause someone to act in an unconventional way.  As normal human beings, we go through things in life that are not pleasant to or for us.  It is normal to have a reaction to those life events.  The key is to go through the emotions, however, do not get stuck there (in the emotion).  Below are some of the emotions that can result from P.T.S.D., as well as strategies on how to help you develop better coping mechanisms for each, in effort to get you to the other side of your through.

 

-The Event is defined as: What occurred that caused the trauma.  Because, we cannot erase the event, it is often times difficult to erase the memory of the event.  To overcome the event, it is helpful to counteract negative thoughts with positive thoughts, whenever your mind wanders to negative thoughts.

 

-Use positive affirmations and motivational videos to help redirect your mind to a more positive state.  You can find positive affirmations on the internet and motivational videos on YouTube. 

 

-You can also call someone who brings out the positive side of you or engage in an activity that brings you the most joy to help get your mind off of the event.  It might help to write down positive affirmations for yourself daily and have them readily available to you, when you do not have access to the internet or positive people and repeat the affirmation as needed.  

 

- Pain is defined as: the internal and/or external condition that the trauma caused.  Pain is inescapable, unfortunately.  No matter what the circumstance is, there will always be something or someone that causes us to feel pain.  Pain can be caused from something you did, something someone else did, or said, or from a disappointment. Despite the cause, allow yourself to feel the pain that you are going through, accept that something or someone hurt you, and then ask yourself what you can do to make yourself feel better and in less pain.  Then, take the necessary steps to work towards living pain free, at least for a while.  Pain is not something that we can escape, avoid or act like it doesn't exist.  We are humans, we having feelings, and because of this it is normal for us to feel pain.  When we try to act like we are not humans who feel, we tend to lie to ourselves about how we feel and why we feel the way we do.  We also try to mask the pain with some type of negative reinforcement that can bring us temporary satisfaction in the moment, or we take our frustrations out on others.  As the saying goes, hurt people, hurt people. 


-To deal with the pain, again allow yourself to go through it, be honest with yourself about what you are feeling.  No one likes to be in pain, however, it is okay to admit when you are in pain, allow people to help you, do not isolate yourself from others, you never know if someone has already experienced a similar situation and can help you through what you are going through. 

 

-Get to the point where you are tired of being sick and tired, and you no longer enjoy dwelling there (in your pain) and do something positive about reconstructing your mindset to a more positive outlook. We cannot escape from being hurt, however, we can mentally escape from the negative thoughts surrounding what/who hurt us.

-Talk to a professional counselor and do not think that you have to deal with pain alone.  If you are a believer, consult with the counseling minister at your church.  Listen to the strategies that he/she gives you and take the necessary steps towards doing what makes you most happiest.  Again, it is normal to feel pain, go through it, just do not get stuck there.  Pain is not a place for anyone to want to remain in forever.

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-Guilt/Shame is defined as: the emotional feeling that is created as a result from a traumatic experience.  Anyone with a conscious has experienced guilt/shame in some way.  I know I have.  Because, no one is perfect, we have to accept the fact that we will make mistakes.  Being accountable for the mistakes that you make, is not about beating yourself up about things you cannot change.  When we make mistakes, we should learn what to do better next time. 

-To deal with guilt/shame, accept the fact that you are not perfect, you are human, which means there is room for error. 


-Ask for forgiveness for whatever is causing you to feel guilt/shame and forgive yourself to reduce or remove the guilt/shameful feeling that lurks on the inside of you. 

-Avoid behaviors that create guilt/shame and become better at decision making.  Often times, thinking about the what-if scenarios before engaging in the activity, can help us avoid engaging in behaviors that can cause us to feel guilt/shame.

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-When it is a situation that you have no control over, that caused you to feel guilt/shame, we have to learn to forgive and do what you can do to move forward in a positive way.

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-Anxiety/Fear is defined as: the internal reaction to the traumatic experience.  Fear is often referred to as False Expectations Appearing Real (F.E.A.R.).  Our mind is a playground for all kinds of thoughts, good/positive and bad/negative.  After, during or before an event occurs, we can experience anxiety that produces a fear response.  This is usually a normal reaction to an unknown outcome and/or a response to a previous outcome in a similar or same situation.  Fear can guide your mind and guard your heart in a positive and negative way; In a positive way, by being cognizant that touching fire can burn you; and in a negative way, by preventing you from taking safe risk, like starting a new school or career path.  Fear and anxiety is present as a safety mechanism, however, we should not let fear or anxiety prevent us from doing positive things that are good to and for us. 

 

-To combat fear/anxiety, approach each situation or person you encounter as new and different, don't place old tags on new items.  Whatever occurred previously in a different experience, does not mean that the same result will occur again. 

 

-Don't be afraid to ask questions directly to the source that you seek to gain information about, before making any decisions.  Let the facts and not assumptions or mere heresay guide your thoughts and actions about the person, place or thing.  The more we know factually about a person, place or thing, the less likely we are to fear it/them and we can make an informed decision about how to approach the situation.   Assume nothing, get the facts.

 

-Don't panic.  Breathing techniques and meditation can help to reduce anxiety.  Too much anxiety can produce fear, which leads to stress and then avoidance.  This is why often times, we have to face our fears, so that we become less fearful and not powerless.  When you face your fears, you take the control back from the thing or person that caused the fear response.  Take your control back, nothing deserves to have that much power over you.

 

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-Anger/Resentment is defined as: the external reaction that can result from a traumatic experience and is often displaced anger, meaning you wrongfully take out your anger and frustrations on the closest people to you, even if he/she is not the person who caused the trauma. Displaced anger is the worst kind of anger for someone else to have to deal with, so do your best at not having someone innocent, pay for the "crime" that someone else committed.  Anger is usually a reactive response to a stressful, defensive or frustrating situation.  When someone has wronged us, we tend to become angry, which later turns into resentment, if we do not control our anger.  Resentment can occur, when we stay too long in a place of anger and the situation does not improve.  When this occurs, we can begin to resent our decisions, and/or the person/thing that caused the anger.  An important part of learning how to deal with anger and resentment is learning how to forgive, which isn't always an easy thing to do, but it is extremely beneficial to our own personal growth, health and well-being.

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-Forgive the person who has caused you to be in a state of anger and resentment.  Just think, if God didn't forgive you for all of your wrongdoings, how would you feel?  Forgiveness doesn't release them from what they did, it releases you from what they did. 

-Forgiveness doesn't mean that you have to stick around what/whoever causes you to be angry.  Too often, we get stuck in being angry about situations and circumstances that it consumes and immobilizes us and makes us act out displaying our angry state.  This is not good to our mind, health or well-being.  Often times, removing yourself from the situation is best.  When removing yourself is not an option, seeking help from a professional counselor can prove to be most beneficial.  In doing so, remember to be completely honest with what you are experiencing and why in effort to get the best guidance/advice.  If you only tell half of the story, you will get half of the help you need, which is not good.

 

-Engage in a safe and positive activity that helps to reduce your anger.  If going to the movies, playing sports, or listening to music helps reduce your anger, do whatever relaxes you.

 

-Practice mindfulness.  Learn how to take control over your thoughts and feelings in a positive way, so that you can control your anger, and your anger doesn't control you. 

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-Depression is defined as an emotional state of being that can result from a traumatic experience, if we do not develop good coping mechanism and consult with a professional counselor about our true real thoughts and feelings.  Depression is serious, especially when it is long-term and impacts our thoughts, lives and those around us.  Depression starts in the mind, if it exist there long-term, it can go to the heart, and then the body will follow.  If not dealt with at the onset, it can cause one to feel a bit crazy, irrational, and isolated. 

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If you experience depression, it does not mean that you are crazy, it just means that you are having a difficult time developing good coping mechanisms to help you overcome life challenges that is causing the depression.  It is best to consult with a professional counselor, sooner rather than later. Here are some strategies to help deal with depression:

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-Acknowledge that your extended feelings of sadness exist.  Do not try to suppress your real feelings to act like everything is okay, if you are not okay.  Talk with someone that you can trust and let them know what is going on with you emotionally.

 

-Don't isolate yourself or become withdrawn that you are unreachable to people.  No one can help you, if they don't know that you need help.  Don't be afraid to ask for help.

 

-Do what makes you the most happiest and try to avoid, as much as possible, activities and people who subtract from your joy.  

 

-If drugs/alcohol is how you cope with depression, know that this is an unsafe way to temporarily escape, and will not work long-term.  What some people do not realize is that drugs/alcohol can actually serve as Depressants, especially when someone comes "down" from a high after consumption.  It is better to get into a safe, long-term treatment program to help you battle with depression and get control of your thoughts, your life, and your actions.   


-Don't be afraid to take control of your life and how you are feeling about life.  Practicing Mindfulness is also one of the ways to help with coping with depression.  When you change the way you think to a more positive state, you can change your negative thoughts and behaviors.

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-Some people with P.T.S.D. also use a doctor prescribed medication in effort to combat negative behaviors. 
 

If you or someone you know is dealing with P.T.S.D. and/or any of the symptoms listed above, consult with your local professional counseling service.  Below are some resources:

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National Board of Certified Counselors:

https://www.nbcc.org/search/counselorfind

 

Mental Health America:

https://www.mhanational.org/finding-help
 

American Counseling Association:

https://www.counseling.org/aca-community/learn-about-counseling/what-is-counseling

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By Lynnette Clement

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Zen
MINDFULNESS

Our mental state is extremely important to our health and well-being.  How we think, is usually what governs our behavior.  Most of us tend to think a lot about things that we can control as well as things that are beyond our control. In the hustle and bustle of life, it is easy to get caught up in overthinking about how we live, how we think, what we eat, what we wear, where we shop, who we love, how we live, where we work, how we raise our children, what school should we go to, how we love, how we want to be loved, what we cook, what we drive, how we process information, how we feel, what we drive, how much money we make or want to make, what's important to us, how we pay our bills, when should we exercise, where should we go, where shouldn't we go, how to dress, how to style our hair, what shoes to wear, what are we going to say, where are we going, what is our purpose in life, etc......you get the point, we tend to overthink a lot.  If we don't try to control our overthinking, our minds can easily burn-out and become exhausted.  When this happens, it can take us away from doing the things that we should do to make our lives better.   There are some things in life that are beyond our ability to control, therefore we should only try to control what we can and leave the rest to God.    

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One of the ways in which you can calm down your thoughts is my practicing various strategies listed below to help create a peaceful state of mind.  This is called mindfulness.  It involves, meditation, prayer, and deep breathing techniques.  It is said that when you mediate, it causes one to put a pause in our brain between our thoughts and our reactions to those thoughts.

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I overthink, so when I can make the time, I meditate.  Sometimes, my meditation is just closing my eyes in a quiet room and repeating the word, Shhhhh..quietly to myself.   This might sound strange to some, but try it, it works.  It calms my mind, shuts down my thoughts and stops me from thinking about things in that moment, and allows me to just enjoy being in the now and at peace.

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Through Meditation, we quiet our minds and focus on the now.  Meditation focuses on the breath, because the physical sensation of breathing is always there and you can use it as an anchor to the present moment. Throughout the practice you may find yourself caught up in thoughts, emotions, sounds—wherever your mind goes, simply come back again to the next breath. Even if you only come back once, that’s okay.  Try this meditation strategy:
 

  1. Sit comfortably. Find a spot that gives you a stable, solid, comfortable seat.
     

  2. Notice what your legs are doing. If on a cushion, cross your legs comfortably in front of you. If on a chair, rest the bottoms of your feet on the floor.
     

  3. Straighten your upper body—but don’t stiffen. Your spine has natural curvature. Let it be there.
     

  4. Notice what your arms are doing. Situate your upper arms parallel to your upper body. Rest the palms of your hands on your legs wherever it feels most natural.
     

  5. Soften your gaze. Drop your chin a little and let your gaze fall gently downward. It’s not necessary to close your eyes. You can simply let what appears before your eyes be there without focusing on it.
     

  6. Feel your breath. Bring your attention to the physical sensation of breathing: the air moving through your nose or mouth, the rising and falling of your belly, or your chest.
     

  7. Notice when your mind wanders from your breath. Inevitably, your attention will leave the breath and wander to other places. Don’t worry. There’s no need to block or eliminate thinking. When you notice your mind wandering gently return your attention to the breath.
     

  8. Be kind about your wandering mind. You may find your mind wandering constantly—that’s normal, too. Instead of wrestling with your thoughts, practice observing them without reacting. Just sit and pay attention. As hard as it is to maintain, that’s all there is. Come back to your breath over and over again, without judgment or expectation.
     

  9. When you’re ready, gently lift your gaze (if your eyes are closed, open them). Take a moment and notice any sounds in the environment. Notice how your body feels right now. Notice your thoughts and emotions.

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Here are other ways to practice mindfulness:

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  1. Set aside some time. You don’t need a meditation cushion or bench, or any sort of special equipment to access your mindfulness skills—but you do need to set aside some time and space.
     

  2. Observe the present moment as it is. The aim of mindfulness is not quieting the mind, or attempting to achieve a state of eternal calm. The goal is simple: we’re aiming to pay attention to the present moment, without judgment. Easier said than done, we know.
     

  3. Let your judgments roll by. When we notice judgments arise during our practice, we can make a mental note of them, and let them pass.
     

  4. Return to observing the present moment as it is. Our minds often get carried away in thought. That’s why mindfulness is the practice of returning, again and again, to the present moment.
     

  5. Be kind to your wandering mind. Don’t judge yourself for whatever thoughts crop up, just practice recognizing when your mind has wandered off, and gently bring it back.
     

That’s the practice. It’s often been said that it’s very simple, but it’s not necessarily easy. The work is to just keep doing it. Results will accrue.

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The benefits of meditation and mindfulness is that it helps to:

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  • Understand your pain. Pain is a fact of life, but it doesn’t have to rule you. Mindfulness can help you reshape your relationship with mental and physical pain.

  • Connect better. Ever find yourself staring blankly at a friend, lover, child, and you’ve no idea what they’re saying? Mindfulness helps you give them your full attention.

  • Lower stress. There’s lots of evidence these days that excess stress causes lots of illnesses and makes other illnesses worse. Mindfulness decreases stress.

  • Focus your mind. It can be frustrating to have our mind stray off what we’re doing and be pulled in six directions. Meditation hones our innate ability to focus.

  • Reduce brain chatter.The nattering, chattering voice in our head seems never to leave us alone. Isn’t it time we gave it a little break?

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Source: https://www.mindful.org/meditation/mindfulness-getting-started/

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If you are a believer, and you know that prayer changes things, a good way to achieve mindfulness is through prayer.  If you do not know how to pray, pick up the Bible and read the Lord's Prayer (Matthew 6:9-13; Luke 11:2-4).  No matter what your religious belief is, if you are a believer, repeat the prayer in the Book that you read as your Word.  If you are not a believer, it is okay to read it anyway, or use one of the other methods for achieving mindfulness.  Don't get caught up overthinking about if your religious beliefs is different from someone else's, just pray in the manner that is aligned with your religious belief.

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Breathing techniques can also be used to achieve mindfulness.  Try these techniques linked below to clear your mind of distractions and noise.  Every now and then, it is good to just take time for yourself to rest your mind, body, and soul and do and think about absolutely nothing. 

Visit Mindful.org via the link below to practice Crystal Goh's 5-minute breathing practice that helps to reduce stress and anxiety.  

https://www.mindful.org/breath-brains-remote-control/ 


May joy, love, mindfulness and peace be with you.

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By Lynnette Clement

Sukhasana
Brain Sketch

It All Begins In Your Mind.  What You Give Power to, Has Power Over You, If You Allow It.

-Sivana East
 

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Yoga Man Namaste
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