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The Empowering Word of the Month for June is Empowered.  To empower someone is to help them find within themselves the ability to do, say, and be whatever they aspire to.  You can empower people in different ways.  I often say that people think how they are, so keep this in mind when you are empowering others.  You might feel like you are empowering someone by helping them, however, dependent on who that person is, what you feel is empowering could be enabling.  

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You might feel like you are empowering someone by not helping them the way that they want to be helped, however, dependent on who that person is, what you feel might be empowering could be viewed as not helping them at all.  As the saying goes, sometimes, "Damned if you do.  Damned if you don't."  So, let yourself off the hook and breathe when you try to empower someone else who might not view your actions as empowerment.  It is not you, who have to check yourself, it is usually the person or people you are trying to empower, that has to check themselves.

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You can even empower someone by being honest and truthful with him/her; even if he/she might not like what you say, if it is coming from a place of love and concern.  When they are ready to receive the information that you convey, it will eventually empower them to have more power and control over their own life decisions, while reflecting on the entire conversation and circumstances that helps to add context to what and why you said what you said to him/her.  For example, if a loved one is experiencing a difficult time and they come to you for advice, you don't always have to agree with everything that he/she does or says to help make you feel like you are empowering them.  You can and should be honest, even if he/she is not yet at the point where they are receptive enough to receive your honesty.  You still have to use compassion, however, when your honesty is coming from a healthy place, it is up to them on how they process the information received, and use that as a tool to be empowered.  The intent of the message is what really matters.

 

When people are going through a healing process, things don't usually make sense until after they have healed.  A healed person's perspective is more holistic; because they can take in information without biases, or flipping the intent behind your empowerment.  For example, if I am trying to empower you by being in agreement with you, when you decide that you no longer want to be in a relationship with someone for mistreatment, and then you later change your mind and go back to the person you said you no longer wanted to be with, how can you then be mad at me for empowering you to be okay, when you really wasn't?   Although, it is not always easy to be empowered or to continuously empower people, it is necessary.

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As you continue to empower people, often times, you too need to be empowered.  Don't get discouraged.  Continue to empower people.  Continue to empower yourself.  Even if your empowering words sometimes get twisted up, misinterpreted, and turned into something negative to help someone else feel better about what they did wrong, continue to be that light, because everyone needs their time in the spotlight.  Be Empowered.

 

By Lynnette Clement