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In your relationship, one of the ways in which you can reassure your mate that you care for, like, or love him/her is by merely showing up (showing up in the aspect of your presence).  How you show up for your mate will depend on the situation.  If your mate experiences grief, your presence could be a hug and a listening ear.  If your mate loses a job, your presence could be an encouraging word, and a helping hand when needed.  If your mate has a bad day, your presence could be a massage/physical touch, a kiss, a listening ear, and a better experience doing something he/she enjoys.  If your mate is not feeling well, your presence of comfort, compassion, thoughtfulness, and caring are ways you can show up for your mate.  If your mate is an entrepreneur, offering up encouraging words, supporting his/her endeavors (buy, promote, engage in active involvement), and asking your mate, How can I help you succeed?, are ways to show up for your mate.

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In your relationship, show up as your authentic self. Showing up for your mate is so important to your relationship. So, be there for your mate, even when you feel that he/she does not need you to be.  When you don't show up, your mate might think that you don't care about him/her nor care about what's important to him/her.  If you care about your mate's happiness, you will show up for him/her.  Your mate shouldn't have to ask you, Where are you, when I need you?

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Your mate might not always tell you when they need you to show up for them, so you will have to get to know your mate to be able to determine when to show up.  If you are someone who does not tell your mate when you need him/her, you shouldn't get mad at your mate for not recognizing when to be there for you.  Your mate is not a mind reader.  Communication is key.  Always communicate your needs.  Try as best as you can to be in the right place at the right time.  Show up.

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Being in the right place at the right time, is about being in alignment with the assignment that God has for your life.   When you are not in position, you could delay and detour the blessing that God wants you to have.  A lot of people say, "What God has for me, is for me," and use this as an excuse to do nothing to align themselves with what God has for him/her.  I believe that when you are not in the right position when God tells you to move, you can either delay or detour what was meant to happen at a specific time.  For example, have you ever liked someone and your pride or ego made you not express how much you liked the person, only to later find that the person got into a relationship with someone else?   Who's to say that their experience with that person might be so good that they stay with that person til' death do them part?  Or, maybe that person treats them so bad that it completely destroys their trust in relationships?  Then, after trust is destroyed, they come back to you broken...do you know how hard it is to try to get that person back to love?  Too often, at that point, the both of you end up destroying each other. 

 

Timing is everything.  So, when you meet someone, or  if you already have someone, in your life that you like and the both of you are ready to commit to one another, Show up!  Show up when he/she needs you.  Your mate doesn't have to monopolize every aspect of your day or life, however, give him/her some of your time by showing up for your mate, as needed.

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​You can show up for your mate by demonstrating the following:

 

Active Listening...without critique, judgment or advice, just listen with empathy.

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Time, put that time in.  Your presence is important however, great or small.

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Support...not only financially showing up, but also mental, physical and emotional support.

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Show Love...not by words only, but by actions as well.

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Relationships can seem like work, because there are requirements to maintaining and sustaining them long-term.  This doesn't mean shy away from being in a committed relationship, because you don't feel like doing the work required.  This means that when you find someone who is worthy of your love and what you have to offer to someone else, if you want him/her to want to stay in your life, Show Up! 

 

Everybody deserves to have someone special in their life that they can count on to be there for them when they need them; even you deserve to have that too.  So, Make time for what and who matters to you.  Life is too short. Take nothing for granted.  It doesn't cost you that much to Show Up!  The most it usually cost you is, time.  Your mate's time is just as precious and as valuable as yours.  If you truly care about your relationship and your mate's happiness...All he/she really wants you to do is, Show up!

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By Lynnette Clement